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Relationships sucks because rejection sucks. You are taking the opportunity along with your heart—you ask a girl aside, your address, you send that flirty text—and if you get turned-down, you think injured.

You-know-what actually frightens me personally? Dating rejection. How can you overcome this? Personally I think paralyzed. Whether it’s inquiring around a woman i prefer or delivering a note on complement, I just believe frozen upwards.

—Mark, 49, Columbia, Mo.

But what’s causing the problems is certainly not getting rejected itself. It’s the manner in which you translate it. Your change it into some thing painful. Your transform it into proof that you’re maybe not attractive to the types of people your yearn to date.

The thing is that, all men (and all of folks in basic, really) need feel very special and vital. You want to become significant. This power try hardwired into our mind. It’s the reason we ascend mountains or push iron.

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